LOL has competition

As I was laying in bed this morning, awake but definitely not ready to get up and be cook, maid, helper to my kids, I recalled an incident with a coworker from yesterday. Our group IMs a lot which can be good and a little annoying. In meetings it's great - we can relay back messages that the speaker can't here - OMG, LOL, WTH...it takes me back to the times of frantically scribbling notes to friends in class while the teacher was writing on the blackboard (do most schools even use blackboards anymore?)

And then there are times when an IM can go on and on with one person and each one is trying to say something funny so the other person can respond with the much loved LOL. There are times when I really am LOL, which actually makes me chuckle more as it's just so funny to me that I'm typing how I'm feeling to someone - gone are the days of actually hearing that LOL. But, what about the times when the joke or statement doesn't really make me LOL? I'm not typically a big laugher - I do a lot of inner laughs...so this is what I came up with this morning - LILI...Love It Laughing Inside. So I'm acknowledging the funny...I really do love it and I had an inside laugh it was that good...not laughing out loud great...but pretty good. 

I'm not sure how to get it out there in public domain - do I trademark it first, register it as a new product...when do my royalties kick in? Well, until then, please feel free to LILI all you want. And if I LILI you, know that I really do love it, and I'm having a great laugh...inside.

friend or foe?

How do you navigate your kids friendships...my kids are 5 and 7 and already I'm dealing with the talk of she's my best friend, then the next day, she won't talk to me, getting invited to a party, them being told they weren't really supposed to be invited...My heart breaks to see my kids already dealing with the ups and downs of figuring out who they are and how friends play into the scheme of their life. 

I have no idea what to say to help them. I comfort my kids, while secretly wanting to go kick some butt in the playground.  How can you tell your kids that they may not even know these same people that they're giving all this power to. How do you say, hey, you're only 5 - best friends are not set in stone.  How do I stop myself from picking up the phone and telling someone's mom - your daughter is being mean (don't worry, I won't!)

Life is so ridiculous and as my goal is to take life less seriously, I'm wanting my kids to figure it out a lot sooner than me.  Honestly, thank goodness for silly shows like SYTYCD so we can sit together and just laugh, cry (hey, it was an emotional dance with an umbrella - you'd cry too if you saw it) and dance at the end of the day. 

What do you all do to help your kids deal with the lovely nuances of life?

What not to say

I've mentioned before, I think, that I'm not that fond of my blog name. And as I was laying in bed last night, unable to fall asleep due to over-reading, leading to over-thinking...I came up with a great theme - what not to do or say! I find myself too often saying things that I should just keep to myself. Take last night, for example - a good what not to say right before bed - hey babe, we didn't talk about our finances over the weekend, should we talk now? I know, when will I learn? Is 10pm really the best time to get a juicy conversation going about credit cards and refinancing. Talk about the perfect way to kill any possible love vibes (to be honest, not sure if that was going to happen anyway, but I definitely stopped any further advances). 

I seem to have this knack for saying exactly what's on my mind, whether good or bad. And as my mind seems to come up with worst case scenarios quite easily, I'm often saying something out loud, while simultaneously telling myself to stop talking! We all say things that shouldn't be said - I seem to have become quite good at it. 

Who am I today?

My mornings are really hectic...as are most of ours, right? I work from home and although I have a pretty early start to my work day, I still have to get kids fed, lunches made, dressed, teeth brushed...and on and on. Add to that checking email, and getting some work done while kids are still home and it's no wonder I love coffee. What I realized today as I was taking my mid day shower (I tell my daughter, at least I'm taking one!) is that there are days when I don't look in the mirror until noon or so! That shocked me - not that I don't get a chance to look at myself earlier in the day - I'm not that vain, but that I actually don't have the time to, even if I wanted to. 

And here's the other part - often times overnight my facial features and body have changed. When I finally look in the mirror, one of three faces can be looking back at me. Face 1 is my wonderful 36 yr. old face - some lines, some tiredness, but overall pretty good - me likey. Face 2 - it's as if a little old lady crept into my bed overnight and switched faces. I mean, honestly - did I really have that many lines around my eyes yesterday, does my face look that worn out, and did my eyes disappear behind a cloak of extra skin? jeez. There's a little old lady out there feeling mighty fine. And Face 3 - the teenage years. I may look well rested, but honestly, do I still have to deal with zits...and how does it get that big overnight! The same goes for my body - there are days when I think, wow, I look pretty good...and other times when I long for the days of a faster metabolism and I wonder how a few slices of pizza and a couple of glasses of wine can really show up that fast! 

No matter, each day, when I finally look in the mirror I get to have a little surprise...now I just have to embrace the little old lady and the teenager more! I hope you're embracing your daily mirror time!

Scarred for life - I'll show ya!

For those of you who've read my post...you know I had some major back problems last year. What a year - now, with clarity  I see how much the back pain affected my life - I was anti-social, depressed and just in pain. Armando - hubbie - was so patient with me...I'm not sure I could have done the same for him! Luckily I had back surgery in September - and the cloud immediately lifted. I went in one morning and after 3 hours of major surgery, with general anesthetic, and a whopping 45 minutes for recovery, I walked (yes, I didn't even get a wheelchair) out of the hospital a new woman. Don't get me started on the crazy recovery. That's another story. All I remember is being so happy to be free of pain - there were times I thought I was just going to live with the pain for the rest of my life.

I was a happy girl, with my happy drugs, and my pain free body. I slept well and after my carry nothing over 5lb restriction (tell me Dr., do you know how much my daughter weighs, or a bag of groceries), I was able to go back to living my life. I guess I was a little too happy at the beginning as I seemed to have this unknown desire to show my scar to people - and random people too - hey principal Grey, wanna see? I'll blame it on the meds I was on - but I recall one instance when we were with my in-laws. I walked into my mother-in-laws house and everyone knew I'd just had surgery. I was beaming. And who do I think might want to see my scar - none other than my brother-in-law (married to Armando's sister). My sweet brother-in-law was suddenly accosted by a drug-popping mama as I lifted up the back of my shirt to show off the long scar on the small of my back! Poor guy - what can you say to that? wow - looks good, or, I can see the top of your underwear! I do have tendency to do and say before thinking things through.

Needless to say, said brother-in-law never asked about my back again - and rightly so! And...I haven't been showing my scar lately...but you know I probably will if you ask me! 

Overthinking life

I realized I stopped blogging for a number of reasons...all of which are due to my overthinking of everything, well most everything I do. For example, trying on jeans the other day...and I started overthinking the size of my ass - is it too big, is it the shape of the pockets, or is it the fact that the jeans are so tight I know if I bend down I'll have another rip incident.  I do have the ability to not think at all - like the hours I spent reading the twilight series and becoming mildly obsessed about robert pattinson for a day or to. Where am I going, you wonder?

Well - in the blogging instance - I overthought. The biggest one is the name of the site - I overthought it and don't like it. I was trying something catchy and because I don't like it, I actually stopped writing! Took me, what 8 months to remind myself that it doesn't matter. Oh, and I overthought - are people really reading this and what' the hell am I writing anyway. 

But, as I sit here, writing, I realize that I do like to write and if it can be funny sometimes, even better. I like to write for myself too - which is a huge realization - yeah for me! I also realized - thanks to my friend Danielle, that I can easily come up with a new name...so I'm writing again, and may think (not overthink) up a new name!

I've got some good stuff piled up over the last 8 months - so get ready.  

Packaged goods

There's nothing like a good box of mac and cheese (organic thank you very much) to really help a dinner on a night that's gotten the best of you. So simple and yet, so rewarding for the kids. They eat it, they want seconds, they're satisfied. The frustrating part is that they'll eat this with no comment, much like they'll eat some amazing meal I cooked up. Their cute little palettes are clueless to whether I cook from a box, or cook my ass off!

Luckily I get enjoyment out of cooking for them and eating a great meal that we enjoy around the table. But tonight - thank you for processed foods!