Thursday, August 6, 2009

Flipper revisited

First of all...I have so many fun things to write about and, I'm sure you all know what this feels like, by the end of the day, when I have a few minutes to spare (that is when I'm not writing this during a meeting, ahem...), I've either forgotten my funny, amazing thought, or I've overthought my thought and don't write anything down! I listen to the musak, waiting for my meeting to start - I'm giving you a few minutes.

Did this happen to you in your earlier years...when I was about 5, I was staying with my nanna and granda and there was a movie on tv...Flipper. Now, this was huge for us - as back in England at that time there were only 3 channels - one of which was mostly news. So a movie was a total treat! Anyway - Flipper is, as I recall to the best of my memory (which is saying a lot as these days I really can't remember what I watched on tv last night), about a dolphin who is taken care of by people in this lagoon. Finally, Flipper needs to go off on his own, back to his peeps, and swim the ocean blue. 

Well - I just loved Flipper and I'm sure had dreams of taking care of a dolphin - wondering how she would fit into the tub. So when, in the movie, Flipper had to leave his human family - I lost it...I mean I really lost it. Uncontrollable crying, no consoling would help, promises of chocolate went unheard...I was a mess. No Flipper - don't go, don't leave us, you're not ready. I was so sad about Flipper and it's become one of those stories that is retold at least once a year, when your parents reminisce about how cute and emotional you were - probably to remind me that cute is still good, but uncontrollable crying is something I should have handled at some point.

It's a vivid memory I'll never forget. So...last week, I recorded a movie for the kids to watch - Miracle Dogs Too. Great theme - dogs that make people feel better, a little drama - mean, or as my son said, inappropriate, teenagers stealing the dogs, but all ends well - dogs get home and new miracle puppies arrive on the scene. So as my tvsitter took over, I was in the kitchen discussing something with husband...and you know discussing is a nice word for quietly arguing. All of a sudden, we hear huge sobs from our daughter, with the words - Captain Pete's going to die - gulping out in between these huge tears. As I started saying things like - honey, it's not real, it's just a movie, Captain Pete's not going to die...I remembered my Flipper and how real he was. 

I switched and started saying - he's a star in the sky watching over us, the miracle dogs made sure he felt ok...and I was there with her - in her sad moment. I tell ya, it was intense! And I just couldn't believe that here I am, helping my little babe get through a little moment that I had over 30 some years ago. 

If/when your moment comes when you get to sit with your little one and help them just remember how real it is for them. Then, after you have helped your child through it - grab a glass of wine and remember the time when you cried over something that felt so real...Flipper why did you leave me...and know that everything is ok.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

My chocolate stash

As I sit here unable to button the top of my shorts (ok, the button is missing and I'm too busy/lazy to put a new on one, but you get the picture) and admire my belly (I hate the term mufffin top - what an awful name. I don't want my gut to be compared to the most yummy part of a muffin. A gut has little yumminess about it and shouldn't detract from the joy of eating muffins), I wonder how I got here. And the only word that sums it up is chocolate. Well, english chocolate to be more precise. Ok, if I'm coming honest here, the english chocolate that my cousin brought over with him, and I should be sharing with the family but can't seem to give it up stash.  There's something so good about cadbury's and curly wurlys and smarties that all rationale goes out the window. A bar for a mid-morning snack, why not? A curly wurly after lunch (which consisted of a salad in the hopes of eating healthy), of course! 

I've come to the conclusion that I just have to eat it all as soon as possible so I can go back to my normal life of eating candy and chocolate...just not All...The...Time. And, I know I should share, I do...I teach my kids about sharing, I've done a good job teaching my husband to share the meal he orders (just one more bite)...and yet this awful cloud comes over me when it comes to english chocolate. All I know to be good and true is thrown at the wayside as I covet my chocolate stash with a vengeance.

So...for anyone who'll come over to my house in the next few days, please ignore my gut, my soon to appear acne, and my hovering as I make sure you don't go into the office, look on the top shelf, find the for your life. Or maybe I just want to be caught!

Saturday, May 23, 2009

LOL has competition

As I was laying in bed this morning, awake but definitely not ready to get up and be cook, maid, helper to my kids, I recalled an incident with a coworker from yesterday. Our group IMs a lot which can be good and a little annoying. In meetings it's great - we can relay back messages that the speaker can't here - OMG, LOL, takes me back to the times of frantically scribbling notes to friends in class while the teacher was writing on the blackboard (do most schools even use blackboards anymore?)

And then there are times when an IM can go on and on with one person and each one is trying to say something funny so the other person can respond with the much loved LOL. There are times when I really am LOL, which actually makes me chuckle more as it's just so funny to me that I'm typing how I'm feeling to someone - gone are the days of actually hearing that LOL. But, what about the times when the joke or statement doesn't really make me LOL? I'm not typically a big laugher - I do a lot of inner this is what I came up with this morning - LILI...Love It Laughing Inside. So I'm acknowledging the funny...I really do love it and I had an inside laugh it was that good...not laughing out loud great...but pretty good. 

I'm not sure how to get it out there in public domain - do I trademark it first, register it as a new product...when do my royalties kick in? Well, until then, please feel free to LILI all you want. And if I LILI you, know that I really do love it, and I'm having a great laugh...inside.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

friend or foe?

How do you navigate your kids kids are 5 and 7 and already I'm dealing with the talk of she's my best friend, then the next day, she won't talk to me, getting invited to a party, them being told they weren't really supposed to be invited...My heart breaks to see my kids already dealing with the ups and downs of figuring out who they are and how friends play into the scheme of their life. 

I have no idea what to say to help them. I comfort my kids, while secretly wanting to go kick some butt in the playground.  How can you tell your kids that they may not even know these same people that they're giving all this power to. How do you say, hey, you're only 5 - best friends are not set in stone.  How do I stop myself from picking up the phone and telling someone's mom - your daughter is being mean (don't worry, I won't!)

Life is so ridiculous and as my goal is to take life less seriously, I'm wanting my kids to figure it out a lot sooner than me.  Honestly, thank goodness for silly shows like SYTYCD so we can sit together and just laugh, cry (hey, it was an emotional dance with an umbrella - you'd cry too if you saw it) and dance at the end of the day. 

What do you all do to help your kids deal with the lovely nuances of life?

Monday, May 4, 2009

What not to say

I've mentioned before, I think, that I'm not that fond of my blog name. And as I was laying in bed last night, unable to fall asleep due to over-reading, leading to over-thinking...I came up with a great theme - what not to do or say! I find myself too often saying things that I should just keep to myself. Take last night, for example - a good what not to say right before bed - hey babe, we didn't talk about our finances over the weekend, should we talk now? I know, when will I learn? Is 10pm really the best time to get a juicy conversation going about credit cards and refinancing. Talk about the perfect way to kill any possible love vibes (to be honest, not sure if that was going to happen anyway, but I definitely stopped any further advances). 

I seem to have this knack for saying exactly what's on my mind, whether good or bad. And as my mind seems to come up with worst case scenarios quite easily, I'm often saying something out loud, while simultaneously telling myself to stop talking! We all say things that shouldn't be said - I seem to have become quite good at it. 

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Who am I today?

My mornings are really are most of ours, right? I work from home and although I have a pretty early start to my work day, I still have to get kids fed, lunches made, dressed, teeth brushed...and on and on. Add to that checking email, and getting some work done while kids are still home and it's no wonder I love coffee. What I realized today as I was taking my mid day shower (I tell my daughter, at least I'm taking one!) is that there are days when I don't look in the mirror until noon or so! That shocked me - not that I don't get a chance to look at myself earlier in the day - I'm not that vain, but that I actually don't have the time to, even if I wanted to. 

And here's the other part - often times overnight my facial features and body have changed. When I finally look in the mirror, one of three faces can be looking back at me. Face 1 is my wonderful 36 yr. old face - some lines, some tiredness, but overall pretty good - me likey. Face 2 - it's as if a little old lady crept into my bed overnight and switched faces. I mean, honestly - did I really have that many lines around my eyes yesterday, does my face look that worn out, and did my eyes disappear behind a cloak of extra skin? jeez. There's a little old lady out there feeling mighty fine. And Face 3 - the teenage years. I may look well rested, but honestly, do I still have to deal with zits...and how does it get that big overnight! The same goes for my body - there are days when I think, wow, I look pretty good...and other times when I long for the days of a faster metabolism and I wonder how a few slices of pizza and a couple of glasses of wine can really show up that fast! 

No matter, each day, when I finally look in the mirror I get to have a little I just have to embrace the little old lady and the teenager more! I hope you're embracing your daily mirror time!

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Scarred for life - I'll show ya!

For those of you who've read my know I had some major back problems last year. What a year - now, with clarity  I see how much the back pain affected my life - I was anti-social, depressed and just in pain. Armando - hubbie - was so patient with me...I'm not sure I could have done the same for him! Luckily I had back surgery in September - and the cloud immediately lifted. I went in one morning and after 3 hours of major surgery, with general anesthetic, and a whopping 45 minutes for recovery, I walked (yes, I didn't even get a wheelchair) out of the hospital a new woman. Don't get me started on the crazy recovery. That's another story. All I remember is being so happy to be free of pain - there were times I thought I was just going to live with the pain for the rest of my life.

I was a happy girl, with my happy drugs, and my pain free body. I slept well and after my carry nothing over 5lb restriction (tell me Dr., do you know how much my daughter weighs, or a bag of groceries), I was able to go back to living my life. I guess I was a little too happy at the beginning as I seemed to have this unknown desire to show my scar to people - and random people too - hey principal Grey, wanna see? I'll blame it on the meds I was on - but I recall one instance when we were with my in-laws. I walked into my mother-in-laws house and everyone knew I'd just had surgery. I was beaming. And who do I think might want to see my scar - none other than my brother-in-law (married to Armando's sister). My sweet brother-in-law was suddenly accosted by a drug-popping mama as I lifted up the back of my shirt to show off the long scar on the small of my back! Poor guy - what can you say to that? wow - looks good, or, I can see the top of your underwear! I do have tendency to do and say before thinking things through.

Needless to say, said brother-in-law never asked about my back again - and rightly so! And...I haven't been showing my scar lately...but you know I probably will if you ask me!